Old Fart
Planter
Well as the round draws to an end, we thought it’d be best to give some insight into the wacky world of the crazy Old Farts of round 31.
Round 31 had begun, and nothing had been planned, with no sign of an alliance to be formed. One simple question of, “Have you planted?” from Jack to Lisette merely a few ticks into the round lead to Jack having Lis on her knees – creating Old Farts. This was the catalyst for a raved recruitment, with the only requirement being that you were loved by Lisette. We all believed because of this, we would be doomed! Before we knew it, the alliance was close to being full - Jack, Richard, Don, Turnip, Manicle, Freddy which made Lis quite happy. Then when she woke, Wacky, Howl and Lordie had also been coerced into joining. A recruitment list was created, with our dream Old Farts on it. Members scrambled to find these players, with some success. We were lucky enough to persuade Melnibone, Arild, Khris and Shadow. Through all this, Lis was still laughing at how this had all happened. The next step was to find enough bed pans and adult diapers to cover all of the oldies. (This was a condition in the contract).
Six days into the round, miraculously Old Farts was rank 7 despite masses of incoming, that we were some how fighting off. At this stage, we had a great line up, consisting of Jack, Wacky, Howl, Don, Freddy, Shadow, Vic, Richard, Tears, Gaz, Tulip, TehPantz, Melnibone, Dez, Sam, Lordie, Bryan, Arild, Khris and Lisette. Some how, with this impressive line up, we still managed to play just for the fun, with a few hours here and then – how long was this to last? Our overview read, “Remember guys, we’re not playing to save the game, we’re not playing to make the round better for everyone, we’re just a bunch of friends playing for EACH OTHER and we’ll fight when we’re ready”. This message inspired us to take things on when we wanted to – it really summed up our position this round. Either that, or we were just senile, thinking that any young person was our grandchild!
Nineteen days into the round, Old Farts were having some hectic times (more than just our bladder problems!). We were beginning to increase activity due to the need to fend off the increased incoming. Our GPs advised us otherwise, and some suffered from Old Fart symptoms. This saw the loss of Dez to the land of retiree. Following this, was the recruitment of Drak into the Retirement Village, which was tricky, as we didn’t have an adequate supply of bed pans!
Around this time we were approached to join in a resistance by DA. We turned down the offer, and thought it wise to use this time to develop individually and as an alliance. This would have been a great time to kill us, as we were so doped up on drugs, anything could have gotten through – but mainly because we were heavily under developed. We were worried about a similar powerblock forming to that of last round. Luckily, we were proven wrong in the long run. Due to our turning down the resistance offer by waving our walking sticks in the air, and having many “The youth these days have no idea!” conversations, we were the target of mass incoming. Luckily for us, we didn’t care a great deal. We were more worried about not crapping ourselves, and the latest models of walking frames, to fret over the loss of some troops – Our pensions covered the cost of repairs anyways!
Old Farts continued to climb the ranks, which was a true amazement to all of us. This was increased even more so with the RebelRapeRepeat adventure. Land poured in, and we seemingly were now up playing with the ‘big guns’. This show of land and score attracted much attention, and of course we were approached from each and every alliance you could think of. In true Old Fart style, we declined anything and everything – ignorance is bliss, especially when we had our enemas twice daily! This however required a high level of activity, and sadly tea and biscuits were running short on supply, meaning we couldn’t support this required activity without a nanna nap. Discussions saw that many of us would be inactive for a week or two period. The decision was to either sleep, and try and rid ourselves of the 80 or so years of wrinkles we’d acquired, or suffer a stroke from the stress of it all. We chose the nice option, and this saw us hit 2 weeks of sleep.
During this time, we played much lawn bowls, saw loads of opera – and had our bowel scans. Great times were had by all. Emerging from sleep saw the retirement of Turnip and Richard – who sadly did not wake from their sleep. This saw large land and score losses, however we were not too shaken.
The last several days have seen new members enter the Old Farts family, and a last minute rush of enthusiasm has been seen. How hearts may we weak, our bladder’s mightn’t work too well (or, work too well in some cases….), however we were still able to have fun, in light of the horrible situation we have faced.
After the creation of the alliance, we agreed we would not get heavily involved. To our delight, we remained this way for the length of the round. We had no backstabbing, no cheating, lack of contactability – basically, no commitments. We simply played for total fun, which was such a difference for many of us, who have played in ‘Expert’ alliances. To be honest, this was just an excuse, as we were all too senile to concentrate for long periods of time!
Old Farts was all about having each members opinions heard. This Old Fart forum account was created, to enable the joint feelings of the alliance to be posted. As well as this, each member in the alliance had full access to all controls in the alliance – well, except the kick button, which our two ladies had control over (Which can be dangerous in times of PMS…). This gave us, as seniors, a feeling of power – which lead to a few broken bones caused from impersonations in the dining room.
To all of those who didn’t enjoy the way we played the round, congratulations – you’re off our will! To those who enjoyed the way we played, you get to hear our child hood stories. It’s a lose lose situation to be honest, heh. Old Farts had an amazing round, which would not have been at all possible without the incredible players that stepped forward for a unique alliance experience.
In summary, a huge thank you to all the Old Farts who have been in the home at any stage throughout the round – the smell of urine is on each and every one of you! A congratulations to Twigley for winning, it’s quite an amazing score and land total.
Love the Old Farts, don’t hate them! (and you might even get some inheritance).
An Old Fart.
Round 31 had begun, and nothing had been planned, with no sign of an alliance to be formed. One simple question of, “Have you planted?” from Jack to Lisette merely a few ticks into the round lead to Jack having Lis on her knees – creating Old Farts. This was the catalyst for a raved recruitment, with the only requirement being that you were loved by Lisette. We all believed because of this, we would be doomed! Before we knew it, the alliance was close to being full - Jack, Richard, Don, Turnip, Manicle, Freddy which made Lis quite happy. Then when she woke, Wacky, Howl and Lordie had also been coerced into joining. A recruitment list was created, with our dream Old Farts on it. Members scrambled to find these players, with some success. We were lucky enough to persuade Melnibone, Arild, Khris and Shadow. Through all this, Lis was still laughing at how this had all happened. The next step was to find enough bed pans and adult diapers to cover all of the oldies. (This was a condition in the contract).
Six days into the round, miraculously Old Farts was rank 7 despite masses of incoming, that we were some how fighting off. At this stage, we had a great line up, consisting of Jack, Wacky, Howl, Don, Freddy, Shadow, Vic, Richard, Tears, Gaz, Tulip, TehPantz, Melnibone, Dez, Sam, Lordie, Bryan, Arild, Khris and Lisette. Some how, with this impressive line up, we still managed to play just for the fun, with a few hours here and then – how long was this to last? Our overview read, “Remember guys, we’re not playing to save the game, we’re not playing to make the round better for everyone, we’re just a bunch of friends playing for EACH OTHER and we’ll fight when we’re ready”. This message inspired us to take things on when we wanted to – it really summed up our position this round. Either that, or we were just senile, thinking that any young person was our grandchild!
Nineteen days into the round, Old Farts were having some hectic times (more than just our bladder problems!). We were beginning to increase activity due to the need to fend off the increased incoming. Our GPs advised us otherwise, and some suffered from Old Fart symptoms. This saw the loss of Dez to the land of retiree. Following this, was the recruitment of Drak into the Retirement Village, which was tricky, as we didn’t have an adequate supply of bed pans!
Around this time we were approached to join in a resistance by DA. We turned down the offer, and thought it wise to use this time to develop individually and as an alliance. This would have been a great time to kill us, as we were so doped up on drugs, anything could have gotten through – but mainly because we were heavily under developed. We were worried about a similar powerblock forming to that of last round. Luckily, we were proven wrong in the long run. Due to our turning down the resistance offer by waving our walking sticks in the air, and having many “The youth these days have no idea!” conversations, we were the target of mass incoming. Luckily for us, we didn’t care a great deal. We were more worried about not crapping ourselves, and the latest models of walking frames, to fret over the loss of some troops – Our pensions covered the cost of repairs anyways!
Old Farts continued to climb the ranks, which was a true amazement to all of us. This was increased even more so with the RebelRapeRepeat adventure. Land poured in, and we seemingly were now up playing with the ‘big guns’. This show of land and score attracted much attention, and of course we were approached from each and every alliance you could think of. In true Old Fart style, we declined anything and everything – ignorance is bliss, especially when we had our enemas twice daily! This however required a high level of activity, and sadly tea and biscuits were running short on supply, meaning we couldn’t support this required activity without a nanna nap. Discussions saw that many of us would be inactive for a week or two period. The decision was to either sleep, and try and rid ourselves of the 80 or so years of wrinkles we’d acquired, or suffer a stroke from the stress of it all. We chose the nice option, and this saw us hit 2 weeks of sleep.
During this time, we played much lawn bowls, saw loads of opera – and had our bowel scans. Great times were had by all. Emerging from sleep saw the retirement of Turnip and Richard – who sadly did not wake from their sleep. This saw large land and score losses, however we were not too shaken.
The last several days have seen new members enter the Old Farts family, and a last minute rush of enthusiasm has been seen. How hearts may we weak, our bladder’s mightn’t work too well (or, work too well in some cases….), however we were still able to have fun, in light of the horrible situation we have faced.
After the creation of the alliance, we agreed we would not get heavily involved. To our delight, we remained this way for the length of the round. We had no backstabbing, no cheating, lack of contactability – basically, no commitments. We simply played for total fun, which was such a difference for many of us, who have played in ‘Expert’ alliances. To be honest, this was just an excuse, as we were all too senile to concentrate for long periods of time!
Old Farts was all about having each members opinions heard. This Old Fart forum account was created, to enable the joint feelings of the alliance to be posted. As well as this, each member in the alliance had full access to all controls in the alliance – well, except the kick button, which our two ladies had control over (Which can be dangerous in times of PMS…). This gave us, as seniors, a feeling of power – which lead to a few broken bones caused from impersonations in the dining room.
To all of those who didn’t enjoy the way we played the round, congratulations – you’re off our will! To those who enjoyed the way we played, you get to hear our child hood stories. It’s a lose lose situation to be honest, heh. Old Farts had an amazing round, which would not have been at all possible without the incredible players that stepped forward for a unique alliance experience.
In summary, a huge thank you to all the Old Farts who have been in the home at any stage throughout the round – the smell of urine is on each and every one of you! A congratulations to Twigley for winning, it’s quite an amazing score and land total.
Love the Old Farts, don’t hate them! (and you might even get some inheritance).
An Old Fart.
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